The Sex Talk – How to be a Great Lover / 100% Treatment Case Acceptance

OMG! An article about sex in a professional trade magazine? Relax, this is not another COSMO survey. Rather a discussion on the philosophy and principles of building extraordinary relationships.

After years of research, attending seminars and reading articles and books on the topic of relationships and communication, as

well as 26 years of marriage to the same person, I have boiled down the art of how to be a great lover to four steps. It’s just not that complicated.

1. Establish Rapport Stop laughing! I told you, it’s just not that complicated. Read on.

Rapport occurs when two or more people feel that they are in sync or on the same wavelength because they feel comfortable together or relate well to each other. A connection exists and they may realize that they share similar values, beliefs, knowledge, or behaviors.

Rapport only takes a few moments to create and/or recognize, but without it, the relationship isn’t going any further. Guys, no woman ever said, “There’s really no chemistry between us. I think he may be the one!”

Wes Jankowski Power To Succeed

2. Ask Them, “What Do You Want?” and, “How Do You Want It?”

An outstanding book on this topic is The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman. The author explains that people feel “loved” differently. While some people feel loved when they receive gifts (for example, flowers or tickets to a sporting event), others feel loved when you spend quality time with them, or offer them words of encouragement and affirmation. The key is to find out what your partner wants and needs, not what you want to give them.

Anyone blushing yet? Everyone has an opinion on what you “should” do and what you “should” have. When was the last time someone asked you, “What do you want?”

Even in the area of love, relationships, and yes, even sex (remember, we’re talking about how to be a great lover), most people approach the partnership from their personal wants and needs instead of their partner. However, building a great relationship isn’t only about you, it’s about your partner.

As a side note, in 1974, Burger King changed the fast food industry by incorporating the slogan, “Have it your way!”

1. Give It to Them! Do we really need to talk about this one?
2. Ask Them, “Did You Like It?” If they said, “Yes,” do it again! If they said, “No,” ask them for clarification and change your approach.

Well, there you have it – four steps to becoming a great lover. Pretty simple. But you’re probably wondering how this relates to dentistry and treatment case acceptance.

Oddly enough, the principles are exactly the same.

1. Establish Rapport As we discussed, in order to build a long-term, romantic relationship, you must first establish rapport. It’s no different in a professional relationship between the dentist and their patient. If a connection that includes empathy and trust is not established, case acceptance will suffer and the patient will always wonder if there is something better out there.

referral.

As a dental practice management consultant, I often interview patients who’ve left a practice to find out what went wrong. Common themes include insurance issues and cost. But just as often, I hear that the patient didn’t feel connected to the dentist or didn’t receive enough quality time.

2. Ask Them, “What Do You Want?” and, “How Do You Want It?”

As a clinician, you were trained to identify problems/issues, present the findings and expect that patients would do what was necessary and recommended. If it were only that easy. Most patients resist accepting treatment because they don’t want to spend the money on dental health. They’d rather go on vacation. As a clinical team, you find yourself trying to sell or convince patients to accept treatment. But, how much selling or convincing would you have to do if you just gave the patient what they want and how they want it?

Learn to ask great questions. Every health history form has some variation of the following question, “If you could

change one thing about your smile, what would it be?” Most patients never fill out the answer and most dental teams never ask the question. What if you knew the answer and the reason behind the answer.

4. Ask Them, “Did You Like It?” If they said, “Yes,” do it again! If they said, “No,” ask them for clarification and change your approach.

Oh, by the way, if they say, “Yes, I liked it!” there is one more step:

Patient: “I wish my teeth were whiter and straighter. I’m a Sales trainer and in front of people all day/every day. I’ve always been a little self-conscious of my smile.”

5. Ask for a Referral The easiest way to grow production/ collection revenues in a dental practice is to find new patients. Practices spend thousands of dollars each year on direct mail, website development and other external marketing programs to achieve new patient growth. This is very expensive and a lot of work. In addition, building relationships with a stranger is more difficult and time-consuming then with people that were referred to your practice.

Anytime a patient acknowledges you, your team, or your

practice for great

service, ask for

Most practices passively invite patients to refer friends and family by posting a sign reading, “Your referral is our greatest compliment.” This approach works, but an active request for referrals produces much better results.

Again, I’ll ask, how much selling or convincing will you need to do in this situation?

Anytime a patient acknowledges you, your team, or your practice for great service, ask for referral. Simply say, “You know Mike, I wish I had a whole practice of people who are just like you. If you know anyone who’s looking for a great practice, I hope you’ll send them our way.” You’d be surprised how many of your patients are just dying to help you grow your business.

Other questions you can ask, “What is most important to you in your overall dental health?” (function, longevity, etc.), or, “What’s important to you about achieving optimal dental care?” (cost and affordability, quality and excellence, etc.). With answers to these questions, you can tailor your treatment and presentation to the specific wants, needs and expectations of the patient. No selling required!

A word of advice – when striving to be a great lover, do not ask for a referral. This will only backfire and cause strain on the relationship. ■

Another patient interview went like this:

Patient: “I don’t want to ever lose my teeth. I was at dinner with my father recently and he loves steak. I watched as he cut it into tiny pieces so he could swallow each piece. He never took care of his teeth growing up and now wears dentures.”

You know what they need. You know what they want. Connect the dots for them. Show them how the treatment they need meets their wants.

For more information about the company and services go to http://www.straightlineprodev.com

3. Give It to Them! Again, do we really need to talk about this one?

Dental Trade Shows

101st Hinman Dental Meeting March 21 – 23, 2013 Atlanta, GA

California Dental Association– Spring Session April 11 – 13, 2013 Anaheim, CA

154th ADA Annual Session October 31 – November 3 2013 New Orleans, LA

Greater New York Dental Meeting November 29 – December 4, 2013 New York, NY